Threads and Plastic

So, last weekend I went shopping with several other waiting mommas. Laura, Donna, and Nancy (with her precious daughter Lily), and I braved the Saturday craziness of our local outlet mall in search of baby bargains. To give you an idea of our shopping prowess, we spent several hours at the mall, and only made it through about six stores.

Embroidered sweaters, ribboned tank tops and ruffled bloomers hanging from tiny hangers beckoned to me invitingly. Shiny plastic toys gleamed on shelves with the promise of future laughter. Yet somehow, surrounded by an excess of adorable options, I find myself emotionally unable to buy...anything.

This month will mark a year since we started the adoption process in earnest, and five years since we started try to have a child. Sadly, with the current lengthening wait for a referral, all signs point to at least two more years to go. I can't buy jumpers and sleepers and hair barrettes when it feels like this may never happen. I want to - oh how I want to believe and pretend and have faith that in the end this will all be a distant memory as I hold my Chinese daughter in my arms. But for now, as I struggle with the concept of "someday", those tangible markers of a distant dream are better left to someone who needs them a little sooner than I will.

The Magic of Pressed Wood Fibers

We finally are official - the mystical "brown envelope" came today from Guangzhou. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this document, the envelope contains all the information and forms we need to get a Consulate appointment and a visa for our new daughter to be. It's now just a matter of time until we get to bring over one new little life to set up shop here in the U S of A.

For whatever reason, not everyone receives the brown envelope, and no one seems to know why some families do and some don't. It's kind of one of those things that isn't really a big deal - families that don't receive envelopes still receive Consulate appointments, but somehow actually opening the mailbox to see official government correspondence sent from China just makes me feel that much closer to bringing our daughter home.

What's ironic is the fact that the wait has extended so long, we may receive a second brown envelope a year or so from now. Yep, we may get to experience this phenomenon twice. But for now, I'm going to just be happy we're one step further along than we were yesterday (and remain in denial about the wait)!

New Month, Same Story

I feel like I'm beginning to sound like a broken record. We're still hanging out in our temporary housing, wondering if we'll ever get to move back home. Although the contractors started working, it's been slow going, and most of what they've completed has been done incorrectly. The wrong faucets were installed, the holes for lighting were cut in the wrong place, and painting errors were made. Can you tell I'm a bit frustrated? Although we were hoping to get back into our house by the end of March, at this point it's looking like we'll be well into April by the time it's all finished.

In other news - I want to say a big THANK YOU to everyone who has sent quilt squares our direction. I'm woefully behind on updating my 100GWQ blog, since I was planning on taking pictures of each squish with the new digital camera I was in the process of buying when the fire happened. Unfortunately, it hasn't been bought yet and my camera phone just doesn't do the beautiful fabrics and wishes we've received justice.

Lastly, I'm looking forward to the upcoming Disney Summit trip with other waiting adoptive mommas (and friends). I'm really looking forward to getting to meet everyone who's going to attend. I'm also excited about going to Disneyland - I've been to Disneyworld in Florida, but this will be my first jaunt through the California version of the Magic Kingdom. I'm not a big roller coaster rider, but just being among the Disney characters and lights and music is enough to make me feel like a kid again.

Oh, and one more thing. Our friend Michele is in China right now, about to meet her new daughter. She's journaling her experiences in China at My Baby Ava. Congratulations, Michele - The moment you've waited for is now only a few moments away!